How many of you are struggling with your in-box? (Me)

How many of you have been “catching up” since 2009? (Me)

How many apologies have you made this month for delayed responses and delivery of promised work product? (Countless)

How many of you are tired of the cycle? (Me)

As of today, I am saying no to saying “yes.”

While working with a wonderful business coach, Vicki Hainault Fitch, I have (once again) determined that 100% of my problems are of my own making. (This is not a huge surprise…)

Since I started my business in 2006, I have seen wonderful growth and been able to enjoy an ever-expanding base of authors and publishers that I truly enjoy helping. But there is also an ever-growing list of authors that I have disappointed when I tried to be of help and fell short.

What was/is the problem?

I want so badly to help every author and to guide each and every new press away from the pitfalls that they face. I end up offering to help on too many projects and fall behind on all. As I struggle to meet expectations (expectations that I CREATED FOR THE AUTHOR), I fall further behind. Then I stay later and later to generate the work promised and, in the end, frustrate the author I was trying to make happy.

All with the added benefit of harming my reputation and health in the process.

The routine looks a little like this: I want to be liked and I want to be helpful and I want approval, so I OFFER (yikes) to help. When the author/client agrees to work with me or to take my help, I feel GREAT. It gives me a little “high.” But that high does not last long. Soon, I am feeling dragged down by all my promises and the VERY reasonable requests from the same authors that I TOLD I WOULD HELP.

I start out with wonderful “zing” feeling when I say “yes” but in doing so, I set in motion a series of events that eventually end with me feeling terrible and doing more harm than good.

Over and over again, what follows is a decline and crash of process that I can usually smooth over with offering more help and spending more time and money. I then end up doing even more just to break even (emotionally, financially, and reputationally) AND it creates even MORE items for my “to do” list.

I am done.

I am putting a one-month moratorium on the word “yes.”

I am not saying I won’t DO anything this month, but for one month, I am not going to agree to, offer, or pursue anything. It is time that I stop pulling up out of the steep dives that happen when I over-commit to project and beloved authors.

I know I can do better and I know I can find a way to help in a manner that does not end with me up at 3 am sending apologetic emails while eating antacids and asking “How did this happen AGAIN?”

Here are my goals for the next 30 days:

1. To not take on any new projects
2. To not do any favors
3. To not say “Oh, I can do that quickly”
4. To use the 30 days to advance and finish my current list of obligations
5. To practice using my calendar and clock in a responsible manner
6. To remember that everything takes time and time is finite
7. To set realistic expectations for how I should spend my workdays
8. To let others tend and harvest the fields I plant
9. To take one day a week off
10. To tell everyone what I am doing without shame or guilt (this one is the hardest…. *deep breaths*)